Installment #4

Hey Everyone,

Time for installment four of the chronicles of Steve. Question of the day... What is a 1/64th of a music note called? Answer at the bottom of this email.

Well, I finally got motivated to write the next chapter of my adventures, so here we go. We have got adventure this time as I traveled to Cologne . Amazing city, with pictures this time. And spent (inadvertently) a great deal of time driving in the Netherlands . Note to self: buy a map you cheap bastard.... There is also Carnivale! Which I missed most of as I was in Canada that week. More on this soon. Also, the joy of driving in Germany .

The most amazing thing happened when I got off the plane this time. I didn't get sick! Such a nice change from hacking my lungs out. It is really something when being healthy is a big point in your life. The completely ironic part was that everyone (with one exception) in the office had some sort of cold. Go figure.

In the past month and a half, I actually had a small trip home. I had to be there to sign some paperwork so that I could allow Laurie out of the country with the kids. No, she isn't running away :-). In order to visit me, she needed the paperwork done. It was a very short trip in which I didn't get to see very many people at all. My apologies if I didn't get a chance to see some of you. I certainly wish my trip could have been longer.

Ok, Carnival. (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Carnival) This is an annual festival, with Christian origins, that is held annually on the west side of Germany (mainly) right before lent. Although the origins were stepped in religious roots, the party (for lack of a better word) is really an excuse to party. This is a family affair as children are everywhere. There are plays, shows, parades and parties. Where it becomes really fun is that most people dress up in costumes and most parties are in public (on the streets, downtown, etc...) Düsseldorf and Cologne (Köln) can have up to a million partygoers on the street at anytime. The best analogy I can think of is Halloween, in February, for an entire week, where you just have a boatload of fun. Since you can already drink in public anyway, this tends to become a fascinating spectacle.

As I mentioned earlier, I missed most of it as I was in Canada . Upon landing in Dusseldorf , I went to the train station to catch my ride back to Bumpkinville , Germany . I actually missed my first train as I couldn't literally get to it in time. There were probably 500 clowns coming down the stairs from the train platform in my way. No, I wasn't being derogatory. There were 500 clowns. Well maybe 300 clowns, 50 cowboys, and various ballerinas, gangsters, hookers, and assorted other strange folks :-)

Hard to get angry when people are having fun. Even though I was very tired, I understood how important this is in Germany . I wish I was here for most of it, but I wouldn't give up my family time for anything. Parties will come and go. Anyway, this Carnivale is as big as Oktoberfest in September (Oktoberfest normally goes from Sept to Oct 2nd). Septemberfest just doesn't have the same ring to it. On the same note, I AM going to Oktoberfest this year. Anyone that wants to go let me know so I can start planning!

So I bought a car. Canadian exchange rates as they are, plus insurance prices here, compelled me to find an "economical" car. Those who know me know that I like my vehicles to be big, or at the very least powerful. Well my black, fire-breathing, 2-door sports coupe does an incredible 0 to 100 kph in "pack a lunch". I can take a nap before getting up to that speed. I bought an Opel Corsa with a 1.2 liter engine. I can hear some people laughing right now. Yes, my motorcycle engine is 50% larger than this "car". I am not sure I can call it a "car", training car maybe.

All joking aside, I can't complain. I couldn't justify a huge expenditure on a vehicle to get me to work, and to get me around for groceries and the occasional excursion. Granted, when doing 100 kph, the engine sounds like a mosquito on steroids. And no, I am not going anywhere near the autobahn in this bad boy. Heck, even the kids laugh when I go through school zones. So much for my internal man of mystery status.

That leads me to the actual driving in Germany . Wow, what can I say? We are spoiled in the land that is known as Canada . So much open space and huge lanes. The only downside is the speed limits back home that are quite slow in comparison. There are many types of roads here: autobahn, regular highway, country roads, and towns. Generally on the autobahn, the acceptable rate of travel is 130 kph, though there is technically no limit. You have to slow down for certain areas (which is considerably more difficult when going 200+) but you can literally go as fast as your death wish allows. Most other highways have a limit of 100 kph. The other roads are usually 70 or 50 depending on where you are, and whether you are in a town or not.

Most drivers here are very good, with the sole exception, it seems, of Mercedes drivers. The typical driver of a Mercedes can be summed up like this "Bah, I have a powerful status automobile, which should be driven to its full capacity. It is not my problem that they built a school here...." Most Mercedes drivers don't care about the speed limits here. Granted a speeding ticket is usually only 20 euros so they can afford it. Doesn't make it right though.

Side Note: Mercedes are considered the “it” cars here. BMWs are just “ok”. Funny how perceptions are different where you live.

There are many small villages spaced out, on the average, about 3-4 kilometers apart. I pass through 2 towns on my way to work, which is only 6 kilometers away. Most towns and areas have two unique features to them that we don't see back home, round-abouts and speed swerves. Round-abouts are circular roads that form an intersection. No lights! You can only enter the round about if it is safe to do so. This is rather effective in keeping traffic moving believe it or not. The speed swerves (not sure of the actual name) are a set of raised bricks in the road to slow down traffic.

Most often found at the entrance and exit of villages. The usual setup is 2 embankments on one side and one on the other. There are two levels of this embankment: low and high. The low parts are sufficiently extended so that two cars cannot avoid it at the same time. The rise is only an inch or two high, so low speeds are not a real problem. You wouldn't want to hit these at high speed. The inner raised part is quite a bit higher. Most traffic lets one way go first and to the "obstacle" course. If you encounter a Mercedes driver, chances are you will have to drive onto the embankment to avoid being hit. I will try and take a picture of one soon for you. There are other types of traffic calming setups here as well. Mainly in villages and towns.

Think we have it hard back home, check here (http://gettingaroundgermany.home.att.net/zeichen.htm ) Talk about confusing. Driving here is not easy. Especially if you don't have a map. There are no signs saying east/west/etc.... Nor do most signs point out the larger cities. As it is very crowded, most signs tell what small town is next, or upcoming. Not that I care whether it is Brunssum or Maastrich. I had a real fun time getting home the other night from Sittard. I decided to drive over to the Netherlands for a movie. They have a stadium-style cinema (8 screens) with fairly recent movies. They also serve beer. Nice!

Anyway, I left when it was dark. Due to lack of map, light, and common sense, I started driving. I ended up at some major city in the Netherlands , which was odd as I don't live near any big city anywhere. I had a generic map I pulled out of a tourist magazine and that was it. Well, 12 villages later, I started to recognize where I was. Problem was, I had just left Sittard an hour previously, and now I was back. It is small wonder that everyone in the office swear by their GPS systems. Ah, it was fun anyway. Now I know the area better. Always have to look to the positive side of things!

So, besides having common sense and a map, I got to see more of the country than I planned on.

Another adventure that I had, was that I went to Cologne . Wow, what a city! I found that Cologne has that really interesting mix of old heritage and modern day feel at the same time. It is quite a site to see 1000 year old buildings next to shiny steel and glass buildings. Very unusual, but cool at the same time. Yes, pictures are included in this email.

Cologne has one of the most magnificent churches in Europe. As you get out of the central train station, you are literally as the base of the DOM. (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cologne). This cathedral is huge, and you can literally see why it took hundreds of years to complete (started in 1248, and completed in 1880). It is simply an amazing work of architecture. I really enjoyed seeing this building. It is quite the site. In answer to many people’s questions, no, I didn't burst into flames walking in the front door. Though I was admonished for failing to remove my hat.

Next to this cathedral was the roman museum that show-cased many artifacts of the roman occupation that had occurred in this area. There were many items of jewelry, tombs, pillars, sarcophaguses, etc... Really amazing when you can see the advancements as the Romans progressed through the various ages (iron, bronze, etc..)

I also took the time to walk around the city. In total, I probably did a 10 kilometer circuit which I enjoyed immensely. Seeing various ancient buildings mixed in with the circus of life was very interesting. There are many "streets" in Cologne that do not allow motorized traffic. Think Sparks street on a huge scale across the city. Cologne has many of the same properties that we do. People begging for change, performance artists, really bad performance artists, colourful characters, and great food. I saw some guy who allowed you to pet his llama for a euro. Insert your own joke in here, I am leaving that one alone. I wasn't fast enough to get a picture of this pink pigeon I saw. I have never seen a pigeon this colour before (no, it wasn't spray painted).

The most disturbing thing was the replica of the statue of David outside yet another museum. The eyes and the colour were just plan wrong. Looks like a jaundiced sex offender.....

One of the fascinating things is seeing how old and new blend together to make this cohesive whole. I can't wait to visit other places soon. This weekend I believe I will be going to Maastrich in the Netherlands and one other place to be determined. If anyone has ever had an inkling to go somewhere around this area, or have a site that they always wanted to go to and/or see, let me know. I can let you live vicariously through me. Let me know the destination/site, and I will do my best to visit it and take some photos.

Laurie and the kids are coming out to visit me next month for 2 weeks. That will be great. The hardest part for me is being away from them. We plan on hitting many classic sites like Euro Disney and Lego Land (for the kids), Brugge and other cities for Laurie and me. I want to take a boat trip on the Rhine , maybe stay overnight in a castle, and ride the bullet train. Unlike Tom Cruise, I will keep my sanity in check and ride inside!

The next few months will be great, and I will hopefully have some amazing pictures for everyone.

All the best.

Steve